Koh Lanta

We arrived in Lanta anxious to find a room on Long Beach. It was getting hot and trekking down the beach with our heavy rucksacks didn’t seem so appealing anymore (in-fact it never really does..!). We tried to find motorbikes but were unsuccessful so we jumped on a tuk tuk to long beach where we found all the middle aged single men hanging out and tens upon hundreds of families. After having found nothing appealing about, we jumped on a pick up and went straight to Klong Nin on the south west side of Lanta to try and find a room at Fevrier where we stayed last year. Malay saw us and greeted us with a big hug and a smile whilst Lek gave us an immediate telling off for not letting her know we were coming. We stayed in their house as there were no rooms available and used the outdoor bathroom which was pretty simple with just a small bucket to wash with and a slimy frog every so often sitting near the tap waiting to jump on you whilst you weren’t looking (One of Sophie’s biggest fears). It was simple and perfect.
The few days In Koh Lanta we had were lovely and peaceful, due to such a heavy week in Phi Phi, it was the best decision we made. The boys, Robin and Oli, came and met us and stayed across the road at a sweet bungalow on the beach front. Sophie was reunited with her beloved Pizza (for any of you who don’t know Pizza is a very small puffy dog) who now only had one eye… very sad, some nasty little kids blinded her with a sling shot!
We rented out some motorbikes and drove down to the National park to see the evil monkeys and have a swim on a quiet beach for once. Robin coped pretty well on the bike, for it being his first time, even on the dirt track that you had to pass through to get to the park. The beach was lovely as ever and the ocean was so clear and warm it had to be one of the most refreshing swims we all had. The monkeys did come and attack at one point but thankfully it wasn’t our food this time! We raced it back before the rain drenched us all and had a quick drink at a small bar on the cliff top looking over the glistening ocean watching the sun set. In the evening we went out to the beach bars, ate some great Thai dishes, tried many different spring rolls (yes same same but different…) and ordered all kinds of Pad See Yew until Sophie actually got it (they kept giving her Pad Thai?!).

One evening we drove up to the local fish market and brought a very large 3 foot long barracuda fish, a kilo of king prawns and some fresh baby squid, which came to a total of £6, just a tad cheap we thought, in-fact it was all caught that morning, that is a big deal for us Londoners who are so use to eating what we call ‘Fresh fish – caught last week’. We brought it all back to our resort and Lek got Mom to cook it on the BBQ and show us how to season everything and not overcook the fish!! The food was bloody amazing and extremely filling as we brought enough for 10 people, then remembering there were only four of us. Having eaten out at so many places already we’d have to say that that had got to be one of the second best meals we’ve ever had (the first one was last year at Fevrier when we helped make fried fish, just too good for words)!
Unfortunately Sophie managed to get a bit of food poisoning the day before we were supposed to leave for Hat Yai so the boys had to go without us but at least managed to grab a lift with Malay who had to go back that way. Sophie and I rested it out for a couple of days and enjoyed an evening with Lek and everyone. Somehow Lek managed to send Mom (the cook) on his motorbike and find Claudy a birthday cake as it was her birthday the next day, which apparently took him most the day as everything was only pre-order. It was a complete surprise to her of course and so sweet of them to do. We cut the slices into four for all the staff and had a couple of tasty cocktails Mom had thought up which were actually really delicious! We were both so sad to leave the next day but we thought as it was Claudy’s birthday, Phi Phi was the place to go and party… again. We said our sad goodbyes and made our way to the crazy island where we were greeted with a nice surprise of no room touts. Not a good sign….
Koh Phi Phi
After much walking and cycling around looking for a room (Kris lent us his bicycle) and as there was not one at our wonderful Garden Homes, we found a 700 baht fan room which was pretty basic but fine and had breakfast included. We spent the afternoon chatting with Kris who told us to go to Garden Homes restaurant for dinner which we did. We got dressed up all 80’s of course, Sophie’s favourite theme, and headed to the restaurant looking like crazy’s covered in glow paint already. Kris welcomed us in and told us to get the fried fish, Claudia didn’t hesitate to say yes. The fish was fantastic, another thumbs up, and to Claudy’s surprise again she was presented with another birthday cake they had made for her, a yummy pancake with honey. We ate as much as we could and offered the rest to some happy customers before we made our way to the beach bars. Our evening was pretty drunken of course, we had enough buckets to last us two nights in a row but oh no we drank them all! Sophie was so sweet as to jump in the fire rope for Claudy (partly forced) and came out with a burnt foot… ouch! We danced through the night and met some mad French Parisians who joined us on the podium. When the curfew came, the annoying 1am close down, we chilled at Stone’s bar for all of 5 minutes until we got accosted by a sleazy Spaniard who was leeching on Sophie, so we moved on home. On our way back Soph managed to announce to some randoms it was Claudia’s birthday and all of a sudden people were singing Happy Birthday To Ya’, it was amaaazing! A girl even got out her neon confetti and started throwing it all around like there was no end, where was it all coming from!!? It was really great and being so drunk and confused it felt more of a bazaar dream.
The morning after was of course pretty horrific as well as our free breakfast (no it wasn’t that bad, was just that you could only ever order toast.. toast toast toast AND jam jam jam!!). That day we met our neighbours who were a couple and also French Parisians (a lot of French this time of year??). They were lovely and most days we hung out with them on our porch. They worked at Ibiza Bar and thought we recognised them, alcohol has an amazing effect on making you forget…
Elly and her gang of friends she met in Koh Phan Gan came over to the party land and stayed at out hostel, resort, hotel thing..?! (Never know what to call them… Room with a porch?). Anyway we hung out with them for quite a few days, chilling on the beach, partying mainly where poor Sophie got extremely drunk one night, think it was those lethal free vodka shots they give out, and Claudy had to take her home but of course not forgetting to save the poor monkey on the way. Sophie was determined to do something about it but unfortunately didn’t happen due to the fact she could barely walk. After two days of Sophie recovering from her horrific incident, we chilled out some more and the group went off to Maya bay for Ellie’s pre birthday present, which we unfortunately couldn’t afford, to camp out for the night. We hung out with our neighbours and then headed to the beach bars for another boogie. Claudia didn’t shut up all night, lots and lots of shit chat about god knows what, possibly the red bull brought this on, until it was nearly 1am! We danced our little asses off for the last hour and had a blast.
We saw the group return from their epic camping journey looking pretty exhausted, and they packed their bags ready to leave for Phuket. We said our goodbyes and stayed on for our last night in Phi Phi. We spent some time at Garden Homes harassing Kris and stealing his internet whilst being offered exotic fruits we’d never tried before, like tasty ripe oranges, moist fresh peanuts and juicy watermelon. Their pet kitten Anna was still there, after we found her on the beach lost and Kris worrying about her for days (what heros we are!). In the evening we went out to one of our favourite restaurants called Garlic and had some pretty awful spring rolls which upset Sophie’s tummy… again (she’s very sensitive to anything remotely ‘funky’ tasting). After our not so impressive meal, we visited our Parisian friends’ new room by the beach which was really cute, a dozen or more bamboo bungalows just far enough away from the music only costing 500 baht a night. We had a drink with them and then hung out with their neighbours who were also French and completely stoned. After much difficulty understanding what one of the girls was saying, the both of us headed back to the beach for one last night. We had a great evening, not too drunken, and hovered straight over to Ibiza bar where Claudia was forced literally FORCED to jump in the fire skipping rope. Claudia actually did this as she was told a free and very strong alcoholic bucket was involved if she got in for just a few seconds. She jumped in and lasted about 2 minutes until the rope was going as fast as it possibly could… She was surprisingly amazing! So much drama and shock, we drank some large gulps of strong bucket and danced the night away until our limbs ached.

The morning after was a little bit of a sensitive one for sophie as her tummy was NOT agreeing with last night’s shenanigans and knew it had to travel to Bangkok by bus that day. Claudia ate her scrumptious toast with jelly and Sophie surprisingly did not. We filled her up on Imodium and headed back to the beach for one last goodbye, plus we got kicked out of our room. Sophie pulled herself together and we both made it over to the pier to catch our boat. Getting on the bus from the boat was pretty easy but pretty uncomfortable the whole way to Bangkok. The bus shook so much we thought the seats were going to ping off their hinges! All in all, go by train if you want to sleep and not hit your forehead on the front seat every 30 seconds!!

Bangkok
We arrived early morning somewhere near Koh San Road. We were forced into taxis to travel somewhat 800 yards which of course we knew was stupid and this con had happened to us last time. We were just waking up slowly when we were pleasantly greeted by a drunk Thai girl telling Sophie she wanted to lick her…..“£”*% $*^ %**^&” (Unfortunately have to blank that, but the amusement of it sent Claudia off choking on her water). We trekked through the centre looking for a room but none were available until 1 pm which we weren’t willing to stay awake for (this is again why you catch the sleeper train!). Eventually we settled for a room at Koh San Palace Hotel where we only had to wait until half 9 in the morning to move in. We had two and a half hours to wait so we killed time by emailing and facebook stalking friends (not so adventurous but we both thought we should stay put in-case Sophie passes out in the streets). We later on managed to move into our room which was surprisingly lovely and looked brand spanking new. The only problem was that we were only some feet away from the main Koh San Road so our evenings weren’t the quietest. We solved this problem though by turning the sound on the TV up as we found this sent us to sleep..?!
Our few days in Bangkok we spent shopping on the Koh San Road and MBK Centre just out of town. We brought plenty of presents for family and about two for ourselves, that wasn’t how it was suppose to work out but ah well, we just love our families far too much… We went for a tasty crispy pork meal (yes last taste of red meat before we hit home..) and spicy fried rice in a cute little courtyard at a place called Hippies De Bar which looked exactly how you’d think… hippy style. They had decked out the courtyard in bright colourful chairs, patterned paisley sofas, fun looking cutlery and a 60’s London style vintage clothes shop. It seemed to have the most relaxed vibe around and many Thai customers which normally means good food which it was! We ventured back to the nightclub we went to the last time we were in Bangkok but then realised we literally had no money plus it was dead inside so we made a drastic decision to go home without having danced a single second.
Our last day we spent by the pool which was very relaxing until we were accosted by some Northern English boys who soaked pretty much everyone sunbathing around it. They began blaring their cheesy RnB music to the point they thought they were so irresistible they were chatting up these two unfortunate Swedish girls who didn’t look the slightest bit impressed, in-fact we saw one of them immediately shove her headphones in as one got chatting. Not that we’re becoming grumpy old snobs already but it really was quite annoying being our last day and all… you can’t help but get irritated after a while! Anyway we had a long sunbathe and went back to Hippies De Bar for a last meal before we had to head to the airport. Claudia was determined to have her sticky rice with mango and coconut milk which she got and then straight after we proceeded to pack all our belongings which was all a bit sad as we both knew it was now time to leave… We grabbed our stuff and made our way onto the busy Koh San Road to go catch a taxi. We got one on meter which was a surprise to the both of us and had one of the fastest journeys to the airport we could remember, the amount of close calls made us rethink how we viewed planes…
Bangkok airport is ridiculously long! We gave up on the shopping front and went straight to our gate where we saw Ian my godmothers husband board the plane. He came over and said hi and sorry for not upgrading us (how could he! Never coming in peak season again) and got on to fly the plane home. Our journey back to England was in-fact very peaceful and we both slept for the first time in a long time. The journey went so fast it was weird. We were all of a sudden off the plane, on the tube and then onto a bus back to Fulham. From being in hot heat 12 hours ago and then smacked in the face with bloody cold miserable whether sitting on London public transport listening to school kids playing music from their phones and talking about crude things, we both all of a sudden wanted to be back in Asia again… Surprise much? We think not. Please lets buy a Moped…





